Sex After Pregnancy
Intimacy with your Partner

Sex after pregnancy may be the last thing on your mind, right?

One of the most common issues after childbirth, and even more if you have a partner, is when to resume sexual relations.

• What if I'm not interested in sex?
• How long do I have to wait to have sex?
• Will it hurt me?
• Which contraceptive method can I use?

What if I'm not interested in sex ?

Your body and your sexuality change dramatically after pregnancy, so you need some time to recover in order to return to your physical and emotional state before pregnancy. It is likely that your sexual desire is not the maximum, which is very normal after delivery.

You shouldn’t feel bad for not having sex after pregnancy, your baby is now your priority.

So, there are two things you should know:

1. The nature is so wise that many men share the same feeling about your level of sexual desire after pregnancy, and are not quite ready for sex either, instead they prefer a more emotional intimacy. However, keep in mind that this can vary from couple to couple.
2. You and your partner should talk about their feelings in an atmosphere of trust, and avoid to blame, force, or accuse each other. The right time to resume sex is when you and your partner feel ready for it, and when both are mutually agreed.

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How long do I have to wait to have sex?

I seriously believe it depends on how you feel and how you get along with your partner. However, keep in mind that those weeks are needed because your cervix has to close and the postpartum bleeding has to stop. Having sex while you are still bleeding is not very pleasant.

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Will it hurt me?

Due to hormonal changes after childbirth, your vagina may be dry and tender, especially if you are breastfeeding. Your doctor may recommend you a lubricating cream or gel, which really helps during penetration.

I had a caesarean and the stitches got infected after a month. So I had to wait more than six weeks to have sex because the scar tissue was painful. After six months the scar still hurt me when I had sex with my husband on top of me.

After talking with my doctor, she told me that I should not worry because the feeling of pain was due to the sensitivity of my skin caused by the surgical procedure. She also recommended me the following:

• To consider a sex position where I am on top or a side or rear entry position to avoid direct contact with my incision.
• To use a vaginal lubricant to assist me in making this experience as pleasant as possible, specially because I was breastfeeding.

Lots of women experience pain mainly because they attempt sex after pregnancy before they are physically and emotionally ready.

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Which contraceptive method can I use?

The type of contraception after pregnancy depends on what you and your partner prefer. If you want to have another baby in the next year or you prefer to wait for a long time, there are short-term and long-term methods of contraception.

The approach to postpartum birth control is different if you are or not breast-feeding. Read about Contraception After Pregnancy

Sex after pregnancy is in some cases even more pleasant because your vagina may be more elastic than before.

Take your time; do not rush before those six weeks. Enjoy your baby.

If this is your first baby, you and your partner have to adjust to your new life of being parents. Read books with your partner about how to raise your baby. There are plenty of books, however I recommend you one of my favorites:

"What to Expect the First Year" from Heidi Murkoff, Sharon Mazel, Arlene Eisenberg, that's my bible.

Take advantage of those times that your baby is asleep and be spontaneous with your partner to have sex. Perhaps act as a teenager, your partner will love that.

Let your partner to put lubricant in your clitoris. You and your partner will take enough time to get into the mood and the penetration will be more pleasant. If you use the condom as a contraceptive method, the lubricant will help quite well.

If you are afraid of having sex or pain due to the cesarean scar, talk to your partner, I am sure he will understand.

Having sex after pregnancy should be done responsibly. If you and your partner want to plan your family after childbirth, both should be well informed about postpartum birth control.

Methods of birth control:

Natural | Aviane | Shot | Patch | IUD | Condoms | Nuva ring | Seasonal | Oral hormones | Emergency pill